1 of 12

By On January 22, 2011 · 45 Comments · In Featured, One Tight Write

Here’s the first of the 12 finalist entries. No author’s name though, we want you to feel free to comment on what you’re reading and not be influenced by who wrote it.

The Color of Love

Momma says I’m beautiful. She tells me I look like a cocoa kiss, full of chocolaty sweetness. My hair gets pulled into big puffy balls, tied up with colorful bands. It’s too short to cornrow.

“Lovely!” she proclaims.

But I wonder if she truly sees me.

My momma is white.

*********

 
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derek

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  • Chuck

    Momma clearly loves the little girl. Sad that she can’t seem to see that. Just a child and already she thinks her color might somehow make people love her less.

  • Big B

    She does, if she has eyes to see……..

  • Miryam

    Nice entry! Life is full of “wondering.” You depicted this well.

  • Peggy R. Dobbs

    What if she sees you with her heart…would you be less beautiful? Your story made me remember the last thing my mother said to me before she died. Isn’t that what stories are suppose to do, stir something in us? Well done.
    Blessings, pd

  • Mac Eagan

    The little girl sees she is different from her mother – perhaps even different from the rest of the family she sees. She makes no comment as to what her father looks like which makes me think he is not around. Children often think that if they are different then there is something wrong with them. That is well captured here. What I wonder is if society around us has us so afraid to even acknowledge physical differences lest we be labeled as “racist” that we end up missing opportunities to explain why those differences are not really important. What harm is being done to future generations by attempting to avoid altogether an issue that is clearly right in front of us? I find your piece thought-provoking.

  • Jendave6

    I love the title. No matter what color we are, how short, tall, thick, thin, etc, when you’re family, love prevails!

  • http://chrissynoelle.wordpress.com Chrissy

    yes, it is okay to mention the elephants. We should in order to appreciate our differences instead of acting as if they don’t exist.

  • http://chrissynoelle.wordpress.com Chrissy

    Lovely.

  • Guest

    What a beautiful perspective of the heart of this little girl. It is obvious that her mother adores her.

  • kf

    I love that you notice the insecurities the girl has instead of sweeping them under the rug to make you feel like a better parent. I think we all have insecurities, no matter how secure the home. However, with constant love and nurturing we grow and bloom into adults that can deal with our insecurities because we know we always have a safe place to return to. Well done.

  • M. Stang

    The girl feels a deeper prejudice than her mom’s proclaimed “lovely,” and her attributes of color; “chocolaty and cocoa; well written by the writer. I think about adoptions or taking in the warm bundle left at the steps, pulling something from a crying garbage bin. How do we know who we saved? Momma thinks she knows, and because she does, everything is as planned. The girl has alot more to say, I’m sure. I wanted to hear that.

  • Cassie

    beautiful! on so many levels…beautiful.

  • EM

    The juxtaposition of the frivolity of the first line of cocoa kisses and chocolaty sweetness with the gravity of the last lines of wondering emphasizes the deep complications of being one of twelve. Something as seemingly simple as getting one’s hair done can instigate questions that last a life time, and with which almost every one can identify. Each word works hard to convey a message of love and how complicated love can be.

  • http://www.lisacstucky.com Lisa S

    Beautiful – just as a momma sees her girl. Well said.

  • ko

    A mother’s love twisted intricately with a child’s self-doubt and feelings of “other-ness.” Both honest perspectives. How does the twist alter the way we love? The way we feel loved?

  • Tlrelf

    I got the chills with this one. . .It makes me wonder why this little girl–or teenager–feels her mother doesn’t see her. . .Could it be the “sweet talk”, or is there something else going on behind this scene? Since I’m a total proponent of “transracial” marriage and childbearing, this issue comes up a lot. But love, as the saying goes, is colorblind. . .

  • ADF

    Truth spoken from a beautiful heart.

  • Holly<

    That was a lot of emotion for 50 words.
    Wow.
    So precious.
    All daughters have insecurities, all insecurities need to be met with a mother’s acceptance and approval, color of skin, shape of body, personality traits….this one’s insecurities are obvious but I think you could put any number of ideas into this same set of words and it would ring true!

    My mother is white, I’m white and yet I still find a commonality with this little girl.
    Great JOB!

  • http://profiles.yahoo.com/u/S4YN7HJTPBRVFTTUVXQTCBELQE Suzanne

    This is written thru the eyes of the girl. Whether her mother sees her or not, the girl perceives that her mother doesn’t see her as she is. One can relate to this because we’ve all felt this way. This has deeper implications which makes it good.

  • Stars Fall On My Heart

    =(

    Oh the woes of being racially mixed. We never really find a solidly black or white area (begging your pardon on the pun) because we’re never one or the other. We are the beginning of something new, but it is often a lonely experience that people, like our parents, can’t always help us. You realize that though you may be an extension of your parents, you are still your own person. No parent can truly know the right way. No parent can truly know the hurts and pains that are uniquely yours. We can only trust that they love us for what and who we are–even if they don’t truly know. <3

  • Courtney

    love the title. love covers so much. and a mother’s love…no words. how you touched on so much emotion in so few words is amazing.

  • Laura

    This momma knows her daughter well enough to know her insecurities and try to settle those feelings with truly supportive words of love. Beautifully done.

  • Thornton Sully

    When my daughter started school she was asked to draw a picture of her family. There we were, with two cats and a dog. Two Sibling, mother and dad. Mom was Malaysian, with caffe au lait skin. So everyone was colored in nicely, with the exception of me. So when I asked Tesse why she didn’t color me, too, she said, at age five “I dunno how to tell you this, Dad, but you’re white”

  • Thornton Sully

    Those who hear but do not listen risk becoming ear elephant

  • Thornton Sully

    Oh the woes of being spatially mixed! My son, who designed this site is now 30, and I forget how he has his mother’s Eurasian features, and not mine. So it’s interesting when we go out drinking beer and act as each other’s wing man people assume he is my gay lover. (Hmmnn, maybe that’s we never got any girls that way?)

  • Thornton Sully

    My own daughter, who I raised as a single father before being a single dad came into vogue, really milks the difference. When we are out and about and can’t help notice the boys giving her the eye, Tesse, who has her mother’s Asian features, looks at me and nods and says “Enchanted by the slanted!”

    But I think a girl’s sense of self esteem come from the father, the first boyfriend, who can tell her how pretty she looks, how smart, what a good job she does in school. And I think for a boy, the sense of self worth comes from the mother. what do you think?

  • Thornton Sully

    I’ll settle for the John Lennon quote: All you need is love

  • Stars Fall On My Heart

    Despite the racial challenges (inner and outer) I believe we were always meant to intermingle and fall in love with each other <3

  • Stars Fall On My Heart

    I hope you’re wrong about a girl getting self-esteem from the first boyfriend. If that’s true, I’m screwed.

  • Miryam

    oh gag… I hate it when people think that!

  • Miryam

    I think both parents are given anointed impartation in their children’s lives that is a perfect balance… when my grand daughter calls from Arkansas she chats with me for a bit, but insists to speak with her “pappy” to receive her blessing… He takes the phone and sings her the blessing in hebrew out of the bible…May Gd bless you and keep you, etc… and then he tells her how she is special with details only a grandfather can share. I love listening…

  • Whitebeard

    Oh the beautiful colors we see. Like the awe inspiring colors of the sky at sunset. A coral reef is full of the diversity of the colors of the light spectrum. What we “see” as color is merely a reflection and then a registration in our mind of that particular person, place or thing. It all diffuses through our own unique filter. Our eyes and brains. The product of this filtration becomes our heart. Dirty filters produce dirty filtration. Hearts that produce hate, insecurity, jealousy, mistrust, and all sorts of undesirable beliefs. Those who aspire to keep a clean filter produce a filtrate quite the opposite. Hearts are not pure.

    Momma sees her color. She proclaims “lovely”. Does Momma only see the hair and skin of her daughter? Or, does Momma see the “color” of this girl’s heart? What Momma sees with her eyes as she fixes the girls hair is only a reflection of her outward appearance. We can only hope that the mother’s filter sees the “color” of her daughter’s heart.

    “But I wonder if she truly sees me”? DOUBT. INSECURITY. FEAR. Can these issues be gathered together and made neat like the stray hairs of this girls head?

    You have made me question my own “filter”.

    How clean is it?

    Very nice presentation.

  • Rich-mc70

    The girl may be sweet. On the inside she may be more sour than sweet. Was she adopted? What kind of trauma and loss affects her self esteem? What kind of pain does she know? She may be beautiful and seem full of chocolaty sweetness, but on the inside she may be more black than white. She needs love, love and more excepting love to heal. Nothing beats a mommy to provide that kind of love. You paint a thought provoking picture in just a few words.

  • sandy

    This entry speaks volumes in so few words. Clearly a super talented author with a huge heart.

  • Thornton Sully

    you misunderstood–the DAD is the first boyfriend.

  • Thornton Sully

    you misunderstood–the DAD is the first boyfriend.

  • M. Stang

    The amazing response to this makes me think that maybe I got my wish. This is so creative. You, who ever you are: fuschia, plumb, cameo, or helianthin, keep doing what you do. This was my second choice.

  • Tisha Deutsch

    I had a lot of fun participating in your contest – thank you for the opportunity. This was my first time entering a writing contest of any kind.

    This was written with my beloved daughter, Meadow in mind. She was adopted from Ethiopia and now lives in Colorado with her large family which includes 7 children, only one of which resembles her in appearance. I know it is hard for her to feel perpetually “different” because she sometimes expresses a desire for “sameness” – especially when it comes to hair.

    It is fiction though – I typically do not use those ultra syrupy, surfacy words as I endeavor to assure her of her beauty and worth. But, I liked the way they sounded and got the point across quickly.

    It could be about all of us though who has ever felt as if we are out of place or like we don’t fit in for any reason in any situation. I was glad some commenters suspected that she could have been a teen (she is 6), or that she was of mixed race, or that she may have had an absent father. As a reader (not usually a writer) I believe that is a huge part of the allure of the written word, we bring our pieces of ourselves to what we read and draw unique conclusions that satisfy us.

    Thank you for the kind, thoughtful remarks. I so appreciate the encouraging, non-critical nature of this site. It’s a breath of fresh air!

  • Claire Gillian

    This was a beautiful piece, one of my favorites. Very nicely done.

  • Mac Eagan

    Tisha, I absolutely loved both of your entries. Time for you to scale back on the reading and ramp up the writing. I hope to see more of your entries here.

  • Stars Fall On My Heart

    Your explanation tells me that you comprehend this “other”-ness. It’s refreshing and comforting to hear the voice of a parent, affirming the presence of your love for your child yet understanding the struggles she may go through. As the youngest child of a bi-racial marriage (my father is of mixed European descent and my mother is Filipino) this self-consciousness rings true. I don’t doubt my parents love me–but I wonder if they know some of the things I’ve gone through. But I guess that’s every parent =) Again, beautiful job…look at all the conversation 50 words generated <3

  • Tisha Deutsch

    Thank you! I must say, I so enjoyed reading your comments on everyone’s stories and thought to myself, “I would like to know her in person!” You have such thought ful responses.

  • Tisha Deutsch

    Thank you. Likewise!!
    I’m so thankful you all offered me such a warm welcome. I was pleasantly surprised!

  • Tisha Deutsch

    Thank you. Yours was my favorite. =)

  • Claire Gillian

    You’re very kind. Thank you so much.