SCANDALOUS!!! A Winner for Criminally in Vain!

By On October 9, 2011 · 49 Comments · In Criminally in Vain : A Thrillogy., Featured, Past Contests: Rules & Winners

Literati
Judge Patty Doody has determined a winner…I know what you’ll be thinking, especially if you skip to the bottom of the page to find the winner (be strong…fight the urge) But I gotta tellya. It couldn’t have been me. I never touch the stuff!

This just in from Patty:

And the winner is…..

Presiding over this contest as the judge, jury and arbiter of literary merit has not been easy. But what an opportunity to read some great stories and really think about what makes a story work.
Steve Myer’s Whose Law Is It Anyway? lays out the sordid backroom scheming that throws the prosecuting barrister off the track in what should have been an open and shut case. “Shut” as in the closet the defendant leaves half open for easy access to both his homosexual love interest and the poor neighbor who happened to satiate his deviant lust for the fairer sex.

Sal Butacci worries me. His stories are so convincing, whether it’s a futuristic wasteland where teenage mutants gun down their neighbors with impunity or a murder scene where the perp is singing a tune by the Perry Como Singers as he goes about his bloody business. In Culprits, he again provides us with a window into a dead-end marriage, where murder doesn’t seem like such a bad idea. Sal’s stories stay with you long after a reading, like a blood stain that won’t go away, even with bleach.

Mac Eagan blew a .30 with Not Me, his account of the reunion of two old comrades in arms. Some people re-connect through Facebook, others through high school reunions, but Mac has these friends find each other through cracker jack police work during a field sobriety test. Coming at the truth through a back door is more fun that going in through the front.

But Gary Clark walks away with First Place with his story, Peter Piper Picked a Peck. This story has it all; flawless dialogue, wicked humor and rectal discomfort!

This story is impressive on many levels.
To begin with, Gary pulls off a very difficult feat: he slips the expository into the dialogue without us noticing it. For instance, we know Miss Bush must be very young indeed and in a great deal of a very particular brand of pain. Her mother, (the “mama” here), is more likely to be wearing a print dress rather than a navy blue powersuit. I can just imagine the ’93 burgundy Plymouth with the sun damaged hood and dented quarter panel in the courthouse parking lot, just where Mama parked it. These fleshed out visuals are not force-fed, but come about through the near-magic power of suggestion. Gary understands how to trigger the reader’s imagination and create a convincing universe.

Equally impressive is the way he explains the intricate “Code” in a very few words. Precedent is skillfully laid out for what falls within and outside the code. Go ahead, rattle off a circumstance, and chances are I would be able to make a pretty good guess whether it falls within the code or not. This is done with spartan economy, no law school required.

The characters in this story ring true, even for this damnYankee. Unpretentious characters who take it slow and easy with their fast women until the Code is violated and honor must be preserved. Girls who need their mama to take them up to the courthouse and sit in the same room with two guys she has known, in the biblical sense. And finally, in a supporting role, the unflappable judge acting as the foil (just the facts, m’am).
But what it comes down to is it’s just a really, really good story. It’s funny, it’s subversive. I can tell it on Sunday in the church parking lot and not have to worry about burning in hell.

Well done Gary!

Now you’re “it”*.

*Judge for the next AWWYP contest

***********************************************************************
Wow. Are we in trouble. This is the first time someone has won a contest twice. AND he is the directum of the veteran’ anthology for AWwYP! There will be no living with the guy, after this…He thinks he walks on water anyway.

No bull. Gary Clark walks on water. Just ask him.

 
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Thornton

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  • Anonymous

    I’m not the best of the best here on this site. It’s just
    that I’ve been chosen to represent you as the winners that we all are – each and
    every one of us. Every contest gets a little harder and forces us to stretch
    our writing into new and unfamiliar territory, finding bigger and better ways
    to tell our stories so we don’t fall behind. We also learn from reading our
    friends’ writing and seeing what works for them and from their “low carb”
    critiques. That’s what we’re all about.

    I’ve watched so many of you get stronger and gain confidence
    by reaching out and finding success in your efforts. I know my writing has
    gotten stronger. These flash tests force me to go back to my novel and tighten
    up each paragraph to make the whole story read better. It’s really great to see
    how we’ve all grown and learned and matured in our writing and encouraged each
    other and supported each other in every story that has been posted.

     So, let’s gather round and have a HUGE group hug – everyone who writes on this site and who has ever written on this site. We’re great – we’re imaginative – we’re creative and we’re AUTHORS!

    And, by the way – Catlow says, “Hey,” and you can borrow his
    toothpick anytime.

  • Mike Casper

    props, Gary, a hot time in the old town to you…and lets hope no bulls were harmed in Patty’s decision!

  • Anonymous

    Thanks, Mike. And, I did check with the ASPCA, PRCA and the PBR up in Patty’s neighborhood and there’s no report of ‘bull mishcief’ that’s been reported. I asked them to keep me informed.

  • Chuck

    Congratulations, Gary.

  • http://www.alongthewritelines.blogspot.com Derek

    Hey, congratulations to Gary – and that’s no bull. 
    And also a hearty bravo to our other finalists.

  • Anonymous

    Thanks, Chuck. Looking forward to reading your entry in the next contest. Good Luck!

  • Anonymous

    And a hearty bravo to the others, indeed.

  • Salvatore Buttaci

    Congratulations to Gary Clark for winning the thrillogy contest! You did an excellent job with your winning flash.

  • Anonymous

    Thanks, Sal. I thought you would win for sure. Your flash was great.

  • Trevortreller

    A just decision. A fine story. An earned accolade. Congrats.

  • http://mikestangconstruction.com Michael Stang

    Good show, Gary, the flash was perfect. The best to you.

  • Anonymous

    Thanks, Trevor.

  • Anonymous

    Thanks, Mike. Always appreciate your good words.

  • Janet Klise

    Big congrats, Gary, for a wonderful story and a solid win!
    Your story was splended, as were a couple of the other finalists’ stories that I really liked.
    Odd, though… My husband (Tim) got barely to the end of the story when he cringed audibly, ground his teeth together, and drew his knees up into a fetal position in his recliner. I don’t know why…

  • Anonymous

    thank you, Janet. And you’re right about the other stories. Every one of them was a winner in my mind.
    Poor Tim, I feel his pain.

  • Diane Cresswell

    Well Cowboy I wake up this morning and read the headlines: Rider of Bull Wins Again!!!  Or maybe that’s Bull Rider Wins A Friend.  I don’t know – haven’t got my glasses on but I knew right away that you were turned loose again into the winner’s circle.  I do believe that I now get to say congratulations on another FINE win of bullish proportions.  To the others – I would not have wanted to be in Patty’s shoes – I would have been using the dart board, or drinking a lot to figure out which one could walk away with the whatever prize is being handed out here.  They were all that GOOD!!!!  Now back to my bat cave…its getting closer to Halloween!!!!  cackle – chortle – chillin’

  • Anonymous

    BTW, Mike – I just looked back in the archives and found you were the Judge when I won my first contest. It was the Grandma story about the ride in the truck and you said the line that got you was when Grandma put her hand on her heart and hollered, “Lord, take me NOW.”
    How time flies. That was back in April I think.

  • Mac Eagan

    Gary Clark a master story-teller?  He is guilty as charged.  Based on Thorn’s comments I am now wondering if you also have a torn hat?  Ripped at the brim from your head swelling up with your accomplishments?  Well. you deserve to indulge in a little head-swelling – you did a terrific job.

  • Mac Eagan

    I think Catlow feels it, too.  Or at least, he did.

  • Anonymous

    Thank you, Mac. I always appreciate your comments and am looking forward to reading your work for the next contest. You are definitely on the short list of authors I worry about when I’m competing. I like the way you write and will match words with you again in, not the next contest, but the one after that.

  • Anonymous

    Well, here’s the deal, Diane. NO ONE is more surprised than I am and that ain’t no bull. Don’t get me wrong – I’m proud to have won this contest and I worked hard on my stories hoping to better my chances at winning. I wouldn’t have entered if I didn’t want to win, but I’m no super writer. If I were I wouldn’t be getting all these Rave Rejections on my novels from agents coast to coast. And besides, you better have plenty of caramel apples on Halloween night ’cause you never know who’s gonna show up on your doorstep wearin’ a new black Silverbelly (that’s a Stetson) and Ostrich boots.

  • Stars Fall On My Heart

    Congrats Clark!!! =D Two in one LOL

    Please don’t “Clark” us again…one is enough LOL Congrats again!!!
     
    P.S. If you haven’t already, see us in Oceanside soon!!!

  • Anonymous

    Indubitably he do.

  • Anonymous

    I’m comin’ to Oceanside for sure, Stars. It’ll prob’ly be after Christmas but we’re gonna have a hell of a party when I get there. And, thanks for the ‘Congrats’. Looking forward to reading your story in the next contest.

  • Diane Cresswell

    I’ll match my ostrich boots with yours!!!!  Carmel apples are a given – with or without nuts???? LOL  Rejections – respections — sometimes you get it and sometimes you don’t .

  • http://www.awordwithyoupress.com/ Thornton Sully

    And just a reminder folks..finalist #5 was Wendy Joseph, who was and is at sea at the moment, and unable to access a computer.  We should come up with some sort of way to acknowledge her achievement when she returns.  I don’t think she even knows she was listed as a finalist.

  • Anonymous

    Well scoot them ostrich hides up real close and order me a Long Neck! As far as the question, “….with or without nuts…” you KNOW I’m crampin’ up tryin’ not to go western answering that one…….but I have a reputation to protect and won’t SULLY my lilly white character just for the sake of a little off-color humor.

  • Anonymous

    Arrrrrrrr – thar she be! Wendy sailin’ the seven seas and missin’ out on the writeoff. Shiver me Timbers – we’ll welcome her back with a treasure chest full o’doubloons and a pint o’grog.

  • http://wmadvantage.tumblr.com Chuck

    Hey Thorn. Love the new front page, but the fancy font you’re using now is kind of tiring on the eyes, especially in the comments where it’s extra tiny.

  • Diane Cresswell

    Why stop now????  I know where your mind goes—lily white my….LOL sneakers!!!!

  • Kyle Katz

    Doubled over in pain, I laughed so hard..watching my rear though. Don’t trust cowboys anymore.Code: Be outrageous it’s the only place that isn’t crowded! Outrageously creative, funny, inspired, out of the box thinking. I’m so happy I dropped in to read this. You really lay the sun at my chest. Fire up my dendrites. Umm, it’s coming to me now… A new spa treatment! Jalapeno pepper juice and KY jelly facial, with a touch of lavender. Burns off the first layer of wrinkles, leaving that sun kissed youthful glow. Blow torch included for a nominal fee.Patty you are skilled. Much thought went into the layout of each piece.  Masterfully executed, tight and targeted to each story. Great teacher on how to do this.

  • http://mikestangconstruction.com Michael Stang

    Yep, that was me.  A great story if I remember right.  Still feel it deserved the win.  You have given us great stuff since then, and now this.  Enjoy!  I do.

  • http://mikestangconstruction.com Michael Stang

    To the other finalists, what was upfront in my mind as I read and re-read the entries was the level of commitment, the effort of creativity put forth.  Our emmaculate judge Patty explains all so well she seems born to the task, I am grateful to have her among us as I am grateful to indulge in this site.

  • Anonymous

    I second that, Mike. Well said and right from your pure heart.

  • Anonymous

    The author of ’Peter Piper Picked a Peck’ is the great grandson of the nefarious Clark from ‘Darla’s Dream’. He inherited it all. Nuff sed.
    And, thank you for the kind words, Kyle. I’m glad you read it and got a good laugh. People seem to laugh at my writing a lot – especially the serious stuff.
     

  • Tlrelf

    Love the preamble to the winner. . .Congratulations Gary! I can hardly wait to see what prompt you’ll concoct!

  • Tlrelf

    Ironies abound, don’t they? We all laugh for different reasons though, I’m thinking. . .

  • Tlrelf

    That sounds like a nice thing to do. . .

  • Tlrelf

    I love group hugs! Thank you, Gary, for your uplifting speech!

  • Tlrelf

    He can’t hide his horns, can he? They just sprout up and out of his head! hehe

  • Tlrelf

    Yes, I had a wee of a time trying to click on it to open this section. . .Can hardly wait for the next contest!

  • Anonymous

    Gary, I’ve been out of whack, a visit to Emergency room over weekend ( a little blood pressure that couldn’t decide what it wanted to do!) and have just now opened up the NEW site. My first reaction was where is everybody????You know old folks don’t like change too much. Then I had to adjust to the new font. So having said all that, I wasn’t a bit surprised. You were in good company but a wonderful choice. You know how I love your writing. Hope to take part in the next contest. Congratulations, my friend. 
    Blessings, pd

  • Tlrelf

    I do believe he may be a humble individual and just wants us to think that he’s not. . .

  • Anonymous

    Glad you’re feeling better, Peggy. Just keep taking good care of yourself and stick with us here…….writing is healing for the body and the mind.
    I was a little surprised with the new look for AWwYP also but am really excited about the possibilities for the future. It’s going to take some getting used to but it’s still under development. I think Morgan, (Thorn Junior), has some great ideas and we’re going to have a much stronger site with better visibility on the web. Great things are in the making and again I’m really proud to be part of it. My part in it is mostly to stay out of the way and let the people who know what their doing do what they’re doing so well - oh yeah – and be real quiet too!
    Looking forward to reading your story in the next contest. I’m looking forward to read EVERYONE’s story. This is going to be a good one!

  • Mac Eagan

    I agree – it looks like you (Morgan, actually) may be defaulting to an 8 point font.  I think you should go with at least a 10 (hush, Thorn, I know your goal is to never go out with less than a “10″ at your side, but that is not what we are talking about).  I do like the return of the “universal navigation buttons” at the bottom of each page.  OK, maybe they are not “universal” since they only go left and right, but I like being able to go straight from post to post without having to navigate back to a contents page.
    Maybe you should post a page about the new site and let us comment there.  I wasn’t going to comment here but there was nowhere else and Chuck already started it.

  • Stars Fall On My Heart

    Yeah…once Thorn posts the next contest LOL

  • http://www.awordwithyoupress.com/ Thornton Sully

    I will talk to the lad about it.  bear in mind (or bare, in mind) thatthe new site is a work in progress

  • http://www.pattydoody.com Patty Doody

    Gary, I had no idea you had won before! Actually glad I didn’t know…

  • Timur Iablokov

    Well done Gary! But, also, well done to all the finalists! You all did a great job.